The beginning of a new year brings so many feelings of hope and positive change. Whether we’d like to admit it or not, most (if not ALL) of us enter the new year with a resolution in mind. What our resolutions are centered around may vary, but we’re all just trying to take advantage of the idea of a fresh start – and I think that’s beautiful.
For me, my new year’s resolutions were a little different for 2018. I grappled with the idea of vocalizing my resolution because the path to acknowledgment was personal and pretty secret. In 2017, I battled severe anxiety and most people close to me have absolutely no idea. Why am I writing it in a blog post? Good question. I chose to make something so personal public because there have been many times my anxiety has kept me up at night, and I would turn to complete strangers’ blog posts on coping techniques, and read through their personal experiences to feel somewhat normal and not alone. So I thought, if just one person read my post and felt comforted, it’s worth it.
Anxiety is crippling. It literally hurts. There have been times where I couldn’t go into a grocery store because, for some seemingly small reason, I developed a panic attack on the 5 minute car ride there, and then cried in my car from embarrassment wondering, “why is this happening?”
Throughout 2017, I’ve learned more about my ‘triggers’ and instead of beating myself up over ‘why’ I have anxiety (because, as I’ve learned, it’s not something I just let happen btw), I’ve accepted it. I am committed to coping and healing vs denial or letting it limit me.
My mental health journey has been a rollercoaster. Life changes make the healing process a little harder but one of my main goals for this year is to stay consistent with my self care and self awareness.
If you struggle with any form of anxiety or depression, know that it doesn’t define you. Your feelings of angst and emptiness do not make you weak. It does not make you less of a woman, wife, mother, sister, friend, etc. It does not limit what you can accomplish in life. Personally, I’ve found that through mediation and becoming much more self aware, I’m prouder of the person I am today. My patience has grown, my anxiety has lessened, and I find happiness everywhere.
Life can get overwhelming for us all. So, I wanted to include some smaller goals that bring me daily joy, and some life lessons that have brought me internal peace and happiness:
- Small accomplishments should be celebrated!
- Take your daily vitamin and feel good for remembering to!
- Set a daily water intake goal.
- Clean a junk drawer.
- Print pictures.
- Commit to working out just once a week – and maybe increase it after a few weeks!
- Save your coins. Buying material things only brings a very quickly fleeting sense of happiness. All the purses, shoes, and jewelry are pointless if you’re trying to show your self-worth to people who don’t value you. — I’ve also become a slight pro at shopping second hand for designer items. Few things feel better than getting a great deal on a Chanel bag in perfect condition. (I’ll save my tips for a different post.)
- Spend time on self healing. Let 2018 be the year you resolve your past issues with old friends, with food, with any bad decision you’ve ever made, etc. You need to move past unresolved issues and find peace for your own well being. The best thing about self healing is that you can do it without the permission of anyone else. Live by the quote, “I am no longer on bad terms with anyone. I’m declaring it. Dislike me by yourself but I wish you the best.”
- Be self aware. We live in a time where everyone wants to be offended over something. But, if we spent more time being aware of our own presence and actions, we’d all be a lot less angry. I used to get so upset if I felt I was in a situation where I was treated unfairly but then I started to ask myself, “Did I have good intentions? Did I do everything I could? Did I do the best I could?” If I could answer all those with a yes then whoever feels differently has a personal problem. Be in control of your life and be a good human.
Have you made any 2018 goals based on past life lessons? I’d love to know!