Five years ago, an unmarried and kid-less me, along with my then fiancé Nick, decided to go out for a late dinner on a Friday night. I remember it was around early December, cold, and at least 8 o’clock when we arrived to a trendy, semi-upscale restaurant and put our names on their waitlist to be seated. As we walked over to the waiting area, I noticed a small family taking up just about every seat. I looked at Nick and most likely, rolled my eyes – I thought, “It’s late, cold, and completely unnecessary to have your young children (three all who looked to be under the age of five) out at a busy adult restaurant – why are they here?!”
As we sat and waited for our names to be called, I bit my tongue as I watched two of the three young children run up and down the small waiting area, and the youngest one, still a baby, fuss as his mother rocked him. “Absolute chaos! My kids will never behave like that.” I said to myself.
Aside from judging moms in public, I frequently evaluated all my friends on social media who had babies.
“You co-sleep with your toddler?!”
“Your ONE year old is eating BACON!?”
“Who gives their toddler McDonald’s – you’re SO lazy!”
Clearly, younger me, who only had herself to worry about, was not the most sought after person for parenting advice. Who the hell was I to judge anyone for their parenting choices?! I was young, naïve, ignorant, and in for a huge awakening just five short years later.
So, to the mom who probably just needed a break from being outnumbered and under-caffeinated in the house all day with three small monsters – I deeply apologize and wish I could’ve rocked your infant for you.
To my real-life friends who I silently judged on Facebook and deemed you a careless, inattentive parent – I’m sorry. I am greatly remorseful for my ignorance.
Why was I such a judgmental b*tch?
Well, what have I learned? Hindsight is 20/20 and karma is real.
Currently, in 2017, I’m a stay at home mom with two girls both under the age of two whose nineteen-month-old has co-slept with us since she was a little over a year, operates an Ipad better than me, and hasn’t died from having McDonald’s a couple of times a month.
As a family of four, we regularly go out to dinner after 6 pm and most times, I’m lucky if my toddler only has one meltdown.
Most times, especially if we’re at a trendy, semi-upscale restaurant, I can feel the death stares from my kid-less peers and I want to tell them that I KNOW what they’re thinking. I want to say that I was in their shoes just a few years ago and that for most of them, their time is coming. One day soon, their child(ren) will be knocking their silverware off the table while they unreasonably scream at you for offering them a french fry.
But this time, I promise you, I won’t judge – I will voluntarily pick up that silverware for you and smile because we’re all in this together.